Long, long ago, in Heaven, Gabriel the archangel found God, looking at a small blue newborn sphere…
Archangel Gabriel looked puzzled and asked God, "Lord, what is it?"
"It's a planet", replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance".
"Balance?" inquired Gabriel, confused.
God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. "For example, here in the place I named central Africa I put green forests and, north of it, I put a desert. Here, north of what will be called Europe, I put a cold land but with hot water sources. Do you see the balance, Gabriel?
And over there, God continued, I put lush prairies with lots of cattle and here small lands in the middle of the ocean with no cattle but with all the fishes they want. Balance…
"Yes" said the Archangel, impressed by God’s work, then he pointed to a small country in Northern Europe,
"What's that one?"
"Ah" said the Almighty. "That is Scotland, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful snow capped majestic mountains, untouched rivers, purple glens, soaring eagles, streams and lochs of exquisite, timeless beauty.
The people will make a drink called Uisge Beatha or Whiskey which means "The Water of Life".
I'm going to give this place tasty silver salmons, spectacular golf courses, coal in the ground, oil under the sea,...
The people will be good looking, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as artists, bold warriors, engineers, inventors and pioneers.
Gabriel gasped in wonder and admiration but then said “Lord, pardon me but I don’t see where there is balance here?”
And God replied.
"Wait until you see the gang of bastards I'm putting just South to them!".
